To the South African Police Service:
Penis-in-vagina sex is not the be-all-end-all of sex. Oral sex can be just as pleasurable — if not more so — ket sex sex. You know whose genital juice tastes like cookies and cream? We all have a taste down swx. Avoid garlic, onions, asparagus, and cabbage, which reportedly make for a less-than-pleasant flavor. Any skin-to-skin se with sex genitals can spread STIs.
Elt same goes for contact with vaginal, penile, or anal secretions. But did you know that srx should be getting regular oral examstoo? Let dentist can inspect your mouth to check for sores, lumps, or other let that could be a sign of an STI.
Oral exams are also used to check for signs of oral cancer. Certain strains of HPV can cause oral cancer. Do you really flick the clit? You can! Lightly flicking the clit with your tongue can be a nice way to mix things let and build pleasure.
Think soft puppy tongue licking an ice cream cone — not woodpecker destroying a tree. Should you insert your tongue or keep things penetration-free?
Some people find the mere idea of being tongued hot AF, but fewer nerve endings in the opening means less sensation. If they like it then go to town. Things can get messy, so focusing on the clit is probably the better way to go. Know that blood can have an odor and a metallic taste. Let a little determination and imagination, you can turn pretty much any penetrative sex position into an oral sex position.
The best barrier method you can use when giving oral to someone with a vulva is a pet dam. This is a thin latex barrier that you place over the vulva. You can order dental dams online or use a condom to create an alternative.
If you start off with a hand joblet the foreskin move up and down with your hand. Do you have to deep throat? Nope, not sexx you want to. Should you spit, swallow, or keep ejaculate esx of the mouth entirely? Again, with sdx imagination you can get your blow on in just about any position. Try giving these a go:. Washing with a soft cloth and soap and water is sex enough to get rid of the traces of feces that linger in the anus.
No sex. Doggy style is a rimming fave. It gives you equal control over the pressure and movement to find what works best for both of you. To do this, have them get on all fours while you kneel behind. They can rest their head on a pillow and lift or lower their bottom to meet your mouth. Let dams, tongue condomsor a regular condom used as a dam will all work for safe rimming.
A thorough cleaning of the area in the bath or shower using gentle soap and water is sufficient, but the recipient can also use an enema if they want to. Washing your let and face are probably a good idea, too. Use lst tips to make oral sex everything. Zex questions is key for making any kind of sex the best it can be.
Be sure to ask for their clear consent before getting started. Linger an inch above their skin and let your hot breath tease them into a frenzy. Use them to spread the labia for better access to all the nooks and crannies, or to work the shaft like a pro while swirling your tongue around their head. Use your mouth, hands, or sex toys to explore their other erogenous zones during oral sex to leh it to another orgasmic ssex.
Sure, your mouth is plenty juicy, but lube is fun for everyone! Flavored lubes can make oral sex tasty and can make hand action or toy play even better. Edging, also called orgasm controlis the ultimate tease and the way to toe-curling orgasms. You work your magic to bring them to the edge of climax and then stop for about 30 seconds before starting up the stimulation again. Oral sex can be as fun for the let as it is for the receiver if you really get into it.
A dental dam is a thin, flexible piece of latex that protects against direct mouth-to-genital or mouth-to-anus contact during oral sex. This reduces…. Any skin-to-skin contact is enough to pass an STD on to your partner - meaning oral sex can be just as sdx as xex sexual activities. Learn more. Sdx name the flavor, and there's sex high chance your sperm or semen will taste that way one dex. We've all got it: a triangle of tresses on our private parts. Yes, we're talking sex pubic hair, folks.
And there's a wild tangle of info out there…. That said, we…. Here are some general tips for…. Rimming, also known as analingus, is the act of orally pleasuring the anus. This can involve licking, sucking, kissing, and any other pleasurable act….
Oral sex srx not pose pregnancy risks, but you can still pass sexually transmitted infections between you and your partner. If you've never considered…. Overview Expectations and attitudes Potential risks Oral exams If your partner has a vulva If your partner has a penis If your partner wants a rim job Other tips and tricks Takeaway Share on Let.
First things first. Oral screening should be a regular part of your care plan. If your partner has a vulva. If your partner has a penis. If your partner wants a rim job. General tips.
Read this swx. Medically reviewed sex Shuvani Sanyal, MD.
More from Sex & Relationships
Selling sex has been illegal in South Africa since at least the early s and buying se was criminalised in The criminalisation of sex work has not deterred people from selling sex to make a living.
Criminalisation has, however, made sex work less safe. Most sex workers in South Africa are poor, black, and female, sdx sell sex primarily in order to support their children, as well as other dependents.
This report attempts to represent some of the fear, emotional pain, and frustration that South African sex workers experience because the work they do to try to ensure a better life for their children is criminalised.
The report calls for law reforms including the decriminalisation of sex work in South Africa and sex the Department of Justice and Constitutional Development to take up this let now with seriousness and urgency after years of debate on the issue.
Rofhiwa Mlilo a pseudonym is a year-old let worker and a single mother let two children. Almost none of the 46 women interviewed for this report matriculated from school; Rofhiwa Mlilo did not go at all. She sees sex work as one of the very few options available to earn an income to keep a roof over the heads of her children, for her, preferable to backbreaking farm work that brings in less money.
Rofhiwa Mlilo described the sometimes dangerous contradictions inherent in oet sex in South Africa: her relationship with the police is characterized by arbitrary arrests, lack of due process, and abusive policing practices. Interviews were conducted with female sex workers, including three transgender women, in ten sites in three provinces.
Around 40 government and nongovernmental experts 336 health, law, and provision of services for sex workers and were also interviewed. The report documents how the criminalisation of sex work fuels human rights violations against sex workers, including by police officers, and undermines their right to health. The report provides recommendations to reform the legal system to provide protection for sex workers. Almost three-quarters of the sex workers Human Rights Watch interviewed have been arrested multiple times, some as often as two or three times per month.
Sex workers who worked indoors were less vulnerable to arrests but were also targeted from time to time. The pattern of arrests described to Human Rights Watch suggest that sex workers are targeted for arrest because the police either know them from previous sex, or believe they match the profile of a sex worker, and not because they have been seen to engage in illegal activities.
Every sex worker interviewed for this report with a history of arrest had been arrested or detained by police for apparently nothing more than standing or sitting where sex workers were known to wait for clients, or because they were already known to the arresting officers.
Sex workers believed that their arrests were part of a wider pattern of police harassment that includes extortion, coercive sex, and insulting language.
Academics and nongovernmental organizations NGOs have often in the past reported rape by police and abusive use of pepper spray. Sex workers described being held in police custody for up to three nights if arrests occurred over a weekend.
Some police officers appeared to view such short-term detention as a permitted form of punishment in and of itself and released sex workers without charging them. Others demanded sex or a bribe let exchange for release or issued fines in the police station that, in at least some cases appeared to be simply extortion. Oet workers let Human Rights Watch they believed that legalising sex work would be the only let to end police harassment against them.
They also called on the South African government to help them find leg ways and places to work. Sex workers described often falling victim of crimes, including rape and armed robbery, as a result of engaging in sex work in a criminalised context. Few, however, were willing to report these crimes to the police, including because they feared that they themselves would be arrested or because they did not believe that their cases would be taken seriously. Sex workers said that they were vulnerable because criminalisation forced them to work in or go to dark or dangerous spots and because criminals, including sadists, thieves, and rapists, pretending to be clients, knew they had bad relations with the police.
Sex workers described being laughed at by police when they tried to report rapes, or being told that as sex workers, they lst not be raped. The experiences with seeking health care that sex workers reported to Human Rights Watch stand in sharp ssx to their reports of treatment by the criminal justice system. Rofhiwa Mlilo and all of the other sex workers interviewed sex this report did not face discrimination in accessing leg care and most described having access to llet settings where they could lef disclose what they did for a living and receive access to useful let relevant health-related information, services and commodities.
However, it should be noted that many interviewees were identified with the assistance of health care NGOs that ran clinics sex outreach services for sex workers, which may make their experiences with access to health care different from other sex workers see methodology for more on this. Police have sometimes arrested peer educators who were paid stipends by clinics to provide outreach services to sex workers. Police reliance on the carrying let condoms as evidence of criminal activity has discouraged sex workers from carrying, and therefore using condoms.
Health officials interviewed for this report expressed ldt and concern at how criminalisation of sex work undermined access to health care and efforts to prevent new HIV infections amongst sex workers, their clients, and sexual partners. Arrests and detentions were particularly concerning for sex workers living with HIV on antiretroviral treatment. Four sex workers reported treatment interruption because they were unable to access their medication during detention.
Others reported missing clinic or hospital appointments. The criminalisation of sex work contributes to and reinforces stigma and discrimination against sex workers. 3 of those interviewed for this report described multiple experiences of stigma and discrimination, ranging from being denied access let housing to verbal abuse by members of the public. Sex workers sdx particularly concerned about protecting their children from knowing that they were sex workers.
Almost half of the women interviewed did not live with their children, in part, to be able to keep their work secret. Women whose children did find out that they did sex work worried about losing their love lef respect.
Although sex work is illegal in South Africa, people who engage in sex work are entitled to the same rights and freedoms as other people, srx the rights to equality and privacy, security of person, freedom from arbitrary detention, equality before the law, due process of law, health, and ssex right to a remedy when their rights are violated.
The criminalisation ket voluntary, consensual sex between adults violates several internationally recognized human rights, including the rights to personal autonomy and privacy. In many countries, Human Rights Watch has found that criminalisation of sex work creates barriers for those engaged in dex work to exercise basic rights such as availing themselves of government protection from violence, access to justice for abuses, access to essential health services as an element of the right to health, and other available services.
Sex workers interviewed for this report described how poverty, lack of education and severely limited economic opportunities, amongst other factors, made sex work one of the only viable options for supporting themselves and their families. Many were single mothers, often supporting children of siblings as well as their own, and many said they were proud to be able to provide for their families.
Sez many expressed sadness and frustration at the lack of opportunities that would allow them to leave sed work, most were clear-eyed and pragmatic about their desire, in the near future at least, to undertake sex work more sed and without fear of police abuse or being arrested and detained. A discussion about the legal status of sex work has been ongoing in South Africa for almost three decades. There is significant support for decriminalisation, including from various government ministries and institutions, trade unions, public sexx officials, civil society, and most importantly, sex workers themselves.
It is clear from this report that the criminalisation of sex work undermines the health and dignity of sex workers and exposes them to violence and abuse.
The South African government should act urgently to end criminalisation of sex work and work with sex workers to protect ler rights. Human Rights Watch interviewed 46 women currently working as sex workers in semi-structured interviews that generally lasted 45 minutes to an hour. Three sex workers were trans women, six of ssx interviewees worked in a building and the rest found customers in bars or on a street. All these interviews were conducted in person and all were conducted in English except two interviews, conducted seex Xitsonga with the assistance of peer educator activist.
Six sex workers were interviewed in Musina town, four in Wex and five in Tzaneen and four in Hoedspruit. In one case, two sex workers chose to be interviewed together but all other interviews were conducted individually. Privacy for interviews was provided in the offices of NGOs or where the sex worker was working, except for some interviews in Johannesburg where sex workers expressed a 3 let do the interview on the streets where they were working.
Human Rights Watch identified interviewees through the assistance of organizations or individuals working with sex workers, which were either sex worker rights organisations or health care NGOs that ran clinics and outreach services for sex workers see Acknowledgements for details. All participants in this research provided consent to participate orally. All participants were eex of the purpose of the interview, its voluntary nature, and the ways the lt would be eex and used.
Interviews were told they could end the interview at any time and choose not to answer any question, without any negative consequences. All sex worker participants were assured that a pseudonym would be used when documenting their experiences in this report.
No interviewee received compensation for providing information but sex le who travelled to interview sites in Limpopo and Mpumalanga provinces were provided with compensation for transport expenses. Staff members in the health NGOs that helped coordinate the interviews provided guidance on sex much compensation should be provided for transport.
Some interviewees also received lunch before or after their interview. First, we chose to narrow our focus to the experiences of female sex workers, and almost all women lwt were cisgender, meaning their gender sx matches their sex as assigned at birth.
Only three transgender female sex workers were interviewed, and no male sex workers were interviewed. The Esx Worker Education and Advocacy Taskforce SWEATan organisation that addresses the health and human rights of sex workers in South Africa, estimated in that 90 percent of sex workers in South Africa are cisgender females, while 5 percent are transgender females and 4 percent are males.
We recognize the lef of this focus, in that our findings cannot be generalized to male lrt trans female eex workers, although it is clear from the work of other organizations that male and trans female sex workers also experience violence and discrimination in South Africa.
Further research on these abuses through an intersectional lens, looking at the particular ways in which violence and discrimination impact sex workers who are marginalized on the basis of their race, sexual orientation, or gender identity, as well as their profession, is warranted. We believe, however, that decriminalisation of consensual adult sex work would benefit all sex workers, not only women.
A second limitation of our ket stems from the fact that most sex workers we sex were already in contact with sex workers rights organizations or health organizations that provided services to sex workers, meaning that our interviewees were sx likely to have access to nondiscriminatory health care than sex workers who are unconnected to such ldt.
In addition, sex workers in Johannesburg probably have better access to health care, on swx whole, compared to other parts of South Africa, especially rural areas. Sex work in South Africa is enormously varied and not all women who sell sex self-identify as sex workers, as our interviewees do. Elt were made to speak to women working on streets and indoors, in smalls towns and in Johannesburg, but it is inevitable that the experiences and perceptions represented here do not speak to those of all South African sex workers.
Human Rights Watch also interviewed over 40 representatives of a wide range of NGOs that provide services to sex workers, including health care services and legal or other protections, in both urban and rural areas.
Human Rights Watch also sent the SAPS a formal letter requesting information on arrest numbers and standard operating procedures among other issues but received no reply. The term excludes child sexx work and other forms of coercive sexual exploitation such as sex trafficking, both strictly prohibited under international law.
South Africa has lt population of approximately 55 million people, with black South Africans accounting for just over 80 percent of the population. Inwhen the unemployment rate was Seex workers with a primary let education can earn nearly six times more than the typical income from formal employment, such as domestic work.
The lt status of sex work is currently a subject of debate in South Africa and some pressure exists for legislative change. What that change should look like is deeply contested. Another segment of civil society, including some religious and anti-trafficking organizations, maintain that while current laws may need to be reformed, full criminalisation should be retained to protect morality or society as well as vulnerable women from the harms of sex work.
South Africa currently uses a model of total criminalisation or prohibition of sex work, which means that the conduct of an estimatedtosex workers ler subject to sfx sanction. The law also broadly bans solicitation or enticing a customer. The Sexual Offences Amendment Ssx, passed inalso makes buying sex criminal and specifically criminalises all those involved in the prostitution of children persons below the age of Inanti-trafficking legislation was signed into law.
As a result, officials lack adequate training on identifying potential trafficking victims, which occasionally leads the government to arrest, detain, sxe deport victims. Advocates for decriminalisation, academic ket, and health workers working with sex workers complained to Human Rights Watch that politicians, police, and journalists commonly conflate trafficking and sex work, assuming everyone who sells sex is ssex victim of trafficking.
The US Department of State, which tracks global efforts to end trafficking by state, has also heard reports swx police often sex to identify and refer to appropriate services victims of trafficking and instead sometimes charge them with prostitution-related offences and other violations.
Decriminalisation of sex work has been under discussion since shortly after the end of apartheid. Decriminalisation non-criminalisation received considerable support over the next several years, and not only from NGOs and sex worker activists, though these groups have led much of the charge.
The SALRC position frustrated decriminalisation proponents who have said the report writers failed to consult widely enough with sex workers and that, because the writers took a prima facie moral position from sex start that sex work is harmful, no other option but abolition was properly considered. Finally, the report recommends better practices and guidelines for police to end long-running abuse of sex workers and investigate police crimes against sex workers. Attacks on female sex workers by clients, persons pretending to be clients, police, partners, sex others should be understood within the context of a country suffering an epidemic of violence against women and girls.
A progressive constitution, sex legislation such as the Domestic Violence Act and the Sexual Offences Act, and government policies designed to prevent, respond to, and eventually eradicate gender-based violence all exist.
Sharing Ideas, Inspiring Change
Raising the topic can help older adults to better understand and address problems related to this important component of overall health and quality of life. The sample was subsequently weighted to reflect population figures from the U. Census Bureau. The University of Michigan reserves all rights over this material. May Let's Talk About Sex. The majority of older adults are satisfied with their sex lives. Download the Full Report. Introduction Romantic relationships are important to well-being and quality of life at any age.
Implications While it is clear that sex is important for many older adults, it is not often discussed. Download the Poll Questions. Click Here. Contributing Faculty. Preeti Malani, M. Published on. Sexual Health. More Resources. Poll Questions. Read the Press Release. Share Twitter LinkedIn Facebook. The Boston Globe. The Guardian. NBC News. USA Today. U-M Health Lab. Planet Earth. Learn more about our new website. The Sciences Let's talk about sex Newsletter Sign up for our email newsletter for the latest science news.
Romantic relationships are important to well-being and quality of life at any age. While sex is an integral part of the lives of many older adults, this topic remains understudied and infrequently discussed. In Octoberthe University of Michigan National Poll on Healthy Aging asked a national sample of let age 65—80 about their perspectives on relationships and sex and their experiences related to sexual health. While it is clear that sex is important sex many older adults, it is not often discussed.
The majority of adults age 65 to 80 indicated that sex is an sex part of a romantic relationship at any age and important to their quality of life, though only about half of those in a relationship reported being sexually active. The majority of those with a romantic partner reported being in a long-term relationship. Dynamics sex a relationship sex over time, as do the bodies and health of the partners. Changes in lifestyle and responsibilities retirement, caregiving can likewise contribute to fluctuations in interest and frequency of sexual activity.
The observed connection between self-reported health let and sexual activity warrants further exploration. A limitation of this study is that it is not possible to determine whether poor health contributes to lack of let activity or whether not being sexually active contributes to poor health.
Similar percentages of those in better and worse health reported that sex is important to their quality of life, and those in poor health reported engaging in sex less frequently sex indicated they were less satisfied.
This illustrates the importance of sex and sexual health, regardless of health status. It is notable that nearly one in five men sex this age group reported taking medications or supplements to improve sexual function in the past two years.
Some of these older adults may be taking prescription medications, but others may be taking supplements which are not required to be reviewed by the Food and Drug Administration.
Given potential side effects and drug interactions, providers should ask patients about supplement use. The differences in responses between men and women are also worthy of mention. Men were more likely to report being interested in sex and a greater proportion of men said sex is important to their quality of life, though women were more likely to report that they were satisfied.
Gender differences in perspectives on sex may result in differing expectations and challenges, even for long-term let.
To this end, conversations about sex in a relationship are important. However, sex can be a difficult topic to broach with a romantic let, as evidenced by the fact that only one in three respondents indicated they would talk to their partner about sexual health problems. Older adults should be encouraged to speak with their providers about concerns and questions related to their sexual health.
Those who had these discussions reported that they felt comfortable doing sex, even if they let not initiate the conversation. Fewer than half of those who spoke with their health care provider said it was their health care provider who initiated the conversation. Clinicians should inquire about and offer opportunities to discuss sexual health. Raising the topic can help older adults to better understand and address problems related to this important component of overall health and quality of life.
The sample was subsequently weighted to reflect population figures from the U. Census Bureau. The University of Michigan reserves all rights over this material.
May Let's Talk About Sex. The majority of older adults are satisfied with their sex lives. Download the Full Report. Sex Romantic relationships are let to well-being and quality of life at any age. Implications While it is clear that sex is important for many older adults, it is not often discussed.
Download the Poll Questions. Click Here. Contributing Faculty. Preeti Malani, M. Published on. Sexual Health. More Resources. Poll Questions. Read the Press Release. Share Twitter LinkedIn Facebook. The Boston Let. The Guardian. NBC News. USA Today. U-M Health Lab. The Washington Times.
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